I fucking suck.

I thought that maybe it's just time I start being a little bit more selfish and put my happiness first. The only problem is I don't know how. I'm not the kind of person that can just ignore a problem that is sitting right in front of her. When something bugs me, it fucking bugs me. Each second I try let it pass on by, I think of yet another detail to worry about. I worry about everything now. It's weird, because that was never me. I was always so confident and trusted everything I heard. Now I feel as though something isn't right. And even my awareness of that big fat "CAUTION" sign posted before me doesn't make me stop and turn around. I don't know why, but I keep on proceeding. It's like a curse- a curse that allows others to take advantage of me. I want to find the cure for this unnecessary stress that I've somehow been bound to. I want to find independence. I want to learn how to be selfish.